Winters used to be cold in England. We, my parents especially, spent them watching the wrestling. The wrestling they watched on their black-and-white television sets on Saturday afternoons represented a brief intrusion of life and colour in their otherwise monochrome lives. Their work overalls were faded, the sofa cover—unchanged for years—was faded, their memories of the people they had been before coming to England were fading too. My parents, their whole generation, treadmilled away the best years of their lives toiling in factories for shoddy paypackets. A life of drudgery, of deformed spines, of chronic arthritis, of severed hands. They bit their lips and put up with the pain. They had no option but to. In their minds they tried to switch off—to ignore the slights of co-workers, not to bridle against the glib cackling of foremen, and, in the case of Indian women, not to fret when they were slapped about by their husbands. Put up with the pain, they told themselves, deal with the pain—the shooting pains up the arms, the corroded hip joints, the back seizures from leaning over sewing machines for too many years, the callused knuckles from handwashing clothes, the rheumy knees from scrubbing the kitchen floor with their husbands' used underpants.
When my parents sat down to watch the wrestling on Saturday afternoons, milky cardamon tea in hand, they wanted to be entertained, they wanted a laugh. But they also wanted the good guy, just for once, to triumph over the bad guy. They wanted the swaggering, braying bully to get his come-uppance. They prayed for the nice guy, lying there on the canvas, trapped in a double-finger interlock or clutching his kidneys in agony, not to submit. If only he could hold out just a bit longer, bear the pain, last the course. If only he did these things, chances were, wrestling being what it was, that he would triumph. It was only a qualified victory, however. You'd see the winner, exhausted, barely able to wave to the crowd. The triumph was mainly one of survival. | Nekada su u Engleskoj zime bile hladne. Mi, a naročito moji roditelji, ržeći u ruci čaj od kardamoma sa mlekom, želeli su da se zabave, želeliprovodili smo ih gledajući rvanje. Rvanje, koje su gledali na svojim crnobelim televizorima subotom popodne predstavljalo je kratak nalet života i boje u njihov inače bezbojni život. Njihovi radni kombinezoni su bili izbledeli, presvlaka na sofi, koja godinama nije promenjena, je izbledela, sećanje na to kakvi su bili pre nego što su došli u Englesku je takodje bledelo. Moji roditelji, cela njihova generacija proveli su najbolje godine svog života dirinčeći u fabrikama za bedne nadnice. Život pun argatovanja, krivljenja kičme, hroničnog artritisa, ispucalih ruku. Stezali bi zube i nosili se sa svojim bolom. Nisu imali drugog izbora. U mislima bi pokušavali da se isključe i da ne obraćaju pažnju na omalovažavanje drugih radnika, susprezali se da ne reaguju na prezrivo cerekanje predradnika, a kada je bilo reči o Indijkama, da ne jadikuju kada bi ih muževi šopali. Izdrži, govorili bi sebi, izbori se sa bolom– bolovima koji sevaju kroz ruke, bolovima u zaribalim kukovima, kočenjem u ledjima od dugogodišnjeg naginjanja nad mašinama za šivenje, nažuljenim člancima na rukama od pranja odeće, reumatičnim kolenima od ribanja kuhinjskog poda starim dugačkim gaćama njihovih muževa.
Kada bi moji roditelji seli da gledaju rvanje subotom po podne d su da se nasmeju. Ali su takodje želeli da dobar momak barem jednom pobedi lošeg. Želeli su da hvalisavi, razgakani razmetljivac već jednom dobije ono što mu sleduje. Molili su se za finog momka, koji je ležao na podu, uhvaćen u dvoprstnom klinču, ili dok su mu se bubrezi skupljali od bola, da se ne preda. Kad bi mogao samo još malo da izdrži, da izdrži bol, da istraje do kraja borbe. Kada bi uspeo da uradi samo toliko, bilo bi izgleda za pobedu u rvanju takvom kakvo je. Medjutim, bila je to samo mukotrpna pobeda. Videli biste pobednika, iscrpljenog, kako jedva odmahuje publici. Pobeda je zaista bila samo puki opstanak.
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