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Translation, MT post-editing, Voiceover (dubbing), Subtitling, Training
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Sample translations submitted: 1
English to Slovak: G. Mikes - TEA General field: Art/Literary Detailed field: Poetry & Literature
Source text - English G. Mikes – TEA
The trouble with tea is that originally it was quite a good drink. So a group of the most eminent British scientists put their heads together, and made complicated biological experiments to find a way of spoiling it. To the eternal glory of British science their labour bore fruit. They suggested that if you do not drink it clear, or with lemon or rum and sugar, but pour a few drops of cold milk into it, and no sugar at all, the desired object is achieved. Once this refreshing, aromatic, oriental beverage was successfully transformed into colourless and tasteless gargling-water, it suddenly became the national drink of Great Britain and Ireland – still retaining, indeed usurping, the high-sounding title of tea. There are some occasions when you must not refuse a cup of tea, otherwise you are judged an exotic and
barbarous bird without any hope of ever being able to take your place in civilised society. If you are invited to an English home, at five o'clock in the morning you get a cup of tea. It is either brought in by a heartily smiling hostess or an almost malevolently silent maid. When you are disturbed in your sweetest morning sleep you must not say: 'Madame (or
Mabel), I think you are a cruel, spiteful and malignant person who deserves to be shot.' On the contrary, you have to declare with your best five o'clock smile: 'Thank you so much. I do adore a cup of early morning tea, especially early in the morning.' If they leave you alone with the liquid, you may pour it down the washbasin.
Then you have tea for breakfast; then you have tea at eleven o'clock in the morning; then after lunch; then you have tea for tea; then after supper; and again at eleven o'clock at night. You must not refuse any additional cups of tea under the following circumstances: if it is hot; if it is cold; if you are tired; if anybody thinks that you might be tired; if you are nervous; if you are gay; before you go out; if you are out; if you have just returned home; if you feel like it; if you do not feel like it; if you have had no tea for some time; if you have just had a cup. You definitely must not follow my example. I sleep at five o'clock in the morning; I have coffee for breakfast; I drink innumerable cups of black coffee during the day; I have the most unorthodox and exotic teas even at tea-time. The other day, for instance - I just mention this as a terrifying example to show you how low some people can sink -1 wanted a cup of coffee and a piece of cheese for tea. It was one of those exceptionally hot days and my wife (once a good Englishwoman, now completely and hopelessly led astray by my wicked foreign influence) made some cold coffee and put it in the refrigerator, where it
Froze and became one solid block. On the other hand, she left the cheese on the kitchen table, where it melted. So I had a piece of coffee and a glass of cheese.
Translation - Slovak G. Mikes - ČAJ
Problém čaju spočíva v tom, že to bol pôvodne celkom dobrý nápoj. Potom skupina významných britských vedcov dala hlavy dokopy a uskutočnila komplikované biologické experimenty, ktoré čaj úplne pokazili. Na večnú slávu britskej vedy ich práca priniesla ovocie. Odporúčali čaj nepiť čistý, ani s citrónom, rumom či cukrom. Máme si doň pridať len pár kvapiek studeného mlieka, čím dosiahneme vytúžený cieľ. Hneď ako sa tento osviežujúci aromatický orientálny nápoj úspešne premenil na kloktadlo bez farby a chuti, stal sa národným nápojom Veľkej Británie a Írska a naďalej si zachováva, dokonca uchvacujúc, veľkolepo znejúci titul „čaj“. Sú príležitosti, pri ktorých nesmiete odmietnuť šálku čaju, inak vás budú považovať za exota a nevzdelanca, ktorý sa už nikdy nezaradí do civilizovanej spoločnosti. Ak vás pozvú do anglickej domácnosti, o piatej ráno dostanete šálku čaju. Naservíruje vám ju, buď srdečne usmievavá hostiteľka, alebo nevraživo tichá slúžka. Napriek tomu, že vás zobudia zo sladkého spánku, nesmiete povedať: „Madam (alebo Mabel), myslím si, že ste krutá zlomyseľná a nenávistná osoba, ktorá si zaslúži smrť.“ Naopak, s tým najkrajším úsmevom, aký ste schopný vykúzliť o piatej ráno, musíte povedať: „Veľmi pekne ďakujem. Zbožňujem skorú rannú šálku čaju, obzvlášť takto skoro ráno.“ Keď vás nechajú osamote, môžete tú tekutinu vyliať do umývadla.
Potom si dáte čaj na raňajky, potom o jedenástej, po obede, v čase čaju, po večeri a znova o jedenástej v noci. Ďalšiu šálku čaju nesmiete odmietnuť v nasledujúcich prípadoch: ak je von horúco, ak je zima, ak ste unavený, ak si niekto myslí, že ste unavený, ak ste nervózny, ak ste šťastný, predtým, než pôjdete von, ak už ste von, ak ste sa práve vrátili domov, keď naň máte chuť, keď naň chuť nemáte, ak ste už čaj dlho nepili, alebo ak ste ho práve dopili. Rozhodne si neberte príklad zo mňa. O piatej ráno spím, na raňajky pijem kávu, počas dňa vypijem nespočetne veľa šálok čiernej kávy a v čase čaju pijem tie najnetradičnejšie a najexotickejšie čaje. Minule som napríklad (a poviem vám to len, aby ste si vedeli predstaviť, ako hlboko môže človek klesnúť) chcel v čase čaju šálku kávy a kúsok syra. Bol to jeden z tých mimoriadne horúcich dní a moja manželka (kedysi dobrá Angličanka, no teraz úplne a beznádejne zvedená z cesty pre moje zlé zahraničné vplyvy) pripravila studenú kávu a vložila ju do mrazničky, kde zamrzla a stala sa z nej tuhá kocka. Naopak, syr nechala na kuchynskom stole a roztopil sa. Dal som si teda kúsok kávy a pohár syra.
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Translation education
Master's degree - Matej Bel University in Banská Bystrica
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Years of experience: 4. Registered at ProZ.com: Jan 2021.
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